It’s all about me, me and wait – me.

I came across this old blog that was written last summer. I have recently gotten away from the Me-Man but I have had many encounters and I hope you can learn from my past experiences. So, without further ado:

The Me-Man

It seems that in my dating experiences, I've fallen into this rift where most of the men that I meet, are all about number one. Of course this side never appears until half way through a seemingly smooth date, when you start to see a bit of this selfish side. But the real question is, are there signs beforehand that would make it easier on us and not leave us with a holy sh*t I cannot believe he just said that look on our face? Are they well hidden or are we just blind to them as we are with many other red flags that men emit? I call this the “me-man” syndrome.

Most women have been here, where you can’t believe that you actually got into this situation with a seemingly nice/handsome/funny me-man that you may or may not be already in a relationship with. It could be that you’re out with a me-man and he asks you something so incredible that you are speechless, but he acts like its nothing. It could be something as simple as “if you cook tonight honey, I’ll do the dishes”. Fair deal. You cook a fantabulous meal and then when its time to clean up, he “forgot” that the game is on, and says he’ll do it next time, and he spends the next 3 hours in front of the TV. He calls into the kitchen that a beer would be real nice right about now…

Here’s another!! Your man is “too tired” to drive your car around the block to see if he knows that that strange noise from under the hood is is, but then 10 minutes later asking if you’d go to the department store with him to help him pick out a tie for his interview tomorrow. Can we take my car so you can check out that noise? No, I’d just rather take mine. So you walk out to the car. I’m tired so can you drive? What’s probably going through your head right now is how can anyone actually be in a relationship with a man like this? Didn’t you know that he was like this before you got involved? Why do you put up with it?? Well, maybe when you get to the store, he sees you eyeing that special purse and buys it for you. You think that maybe he was just too tired, and he means well. Bullsh*t!! Honey, get out now. I’ll bet ya ten dollars that he offers to drive on the way home and you get all happy with him again, thinking things are better, then he casually mentions how horny you make him and if you wouldn’t mind…

So what are the warning signs?? I have found several, but there are many: being cheap, worrying too much about what people think about him, walking in front of you not with you, interrupting you when you are talking, asking that you travel to their “turf”, never asking about your day, reneging, and many more too numerous to list. I’m not saying that having one of these traits means that he is a me-man by any means. But these are red flags that I have in the past just disregarded and have come back to haunt me.

Why do men feel that everything is deserving of them?? That they can jus ask something us of and assume it’ll get done. Most women aren’t like that. But most importantly I have heard women wonder why men act this way and why they feel like everything should be given to them with no regard to anyone else’s feelings or actions?? Because we let them!! They have grown accustomed to us giving and giving and giving. We need to hold them accountable. And yes I know not all women let this happen. I for one have recently begun to stand up for myself in these situations. Don’t be too cynical with them. Maybe he does have a good excuse. Maybe he really is “too tired”. But he if doesn’t step it up, and this becomes an ongoing thing, you may have a problem. I’ve had a man ask me flat out for a blow job just like he was asking for a bottle of water. I’ve never sat on the couch with a guy and been like “Honey? You know what sounds real good right about now? How about you get me a glass of wine and spend a little time downtown before we go to sleep. Oh, and tomorrow on your way to work, can you drop of my dry cleaning and pick me up a pair of panty hose at the drugstore?” Well, maybe we should.